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A Hole In The Ocean: How Mitt Romney's Shining Reservoir On The Hill Trickles Down

Obama, in 1998, says he favors “some redistribution” (presumably of ‘wealth’).

Really? The clear implication is that government has a proper role in reallocating resources to meet emerging needs and changing conditions.  Romney’s view (circa May 2012) is “wealth” –like water- seeks its own ‘natural’ level, and the natural level is for holders of wealth to get more (i.e. ‘wealth’ should be pumped uphill, where it naturally resides in large reservoirs where the right people can use it .  It is up to the ‘wealthy’ to determine how much, if any, needs to flow back down hill (through wages, or purchase of other goods and services from the less wealthy). In this model, note that the wealthy also control gravity, i.e. the distribution of wealth (see: “trickle down”),

In other words, the rich do God’s work.

What would Romney do?  

Let’s now consider God’s work (granting me the benefit of my doubt as to the active involvement of a ‘superior, omnipotent’ intelligence making these kinds of decisions).

God seems to agree with Romney. S/he (I’m also not clear on the gender issue) has not given people living in the desert as much water as those who live in  a rain forest, nor has s/he given as much oxygen to people who live in the mountains, as s/he has made available to those who live at lower altitudes. Even the distribution of edible plants and animals seems uneven.

So, why would God distribute wealth differently? Money is just another natural resource that is naturally distributed unevenly, by God.  ((What's that you say? You say God doesn't believe "money" is natural? You say both Jehovah and Mohammed made this perfectly clear? That money was un-godly. Money changers should be chased from the temple? Charging interest for lending money is a blasphemous? Nonsense.)

The rich are not like other people

Well then, it seems God is leaving the money issue to us, and if we want to distribute it evenly or unevenly that's up to us. Let the rich store it all and decide how it should be distributed. They do such a good job, we really ought to put them in charge of distributing everything. Let's invent financial markets rich people can run, set prices, borrow money, pick winners and losers; collect interest. God probably knows best and he choses who will be the rich people.  

Maybe they should also decide how to spend it. Like those folks up there at South Fork Fishing and Hunting Club. (Ok, they made a little mistake, God world forgive them, yes? Eye of what needle?) 

God sees money as an unnatural thing, a creation of humans who are not God. Nonsense. God's natural sense of distribution is that  what belongs to God, is managed by God.  It should be the distributed unevenly.

The rich seem to get this. It seems that the wealthy concentrate in cities, as opposed to rural settings. Lets make country people poor and city people rich (Mitten exception: "...unless they happen to be poor people who move to the city to work for dirt.) (Mitten proviso: "It just proves my point,  if they are willing to work for dirt, why in the world would them move to our cities when they already live in place where there is plenty of dirt? Wow! Poor people. What can they be thinking?")

In fact, it’s not even all cities, but a small network of less than 200 cities worldwide. That too must be a natural allocation which, if tampered with, would risks the His/Her wrath.

Theology that fits like a Mitten

Given this natural state of affairs, the very idea of democracy runs counter to His/Her order of things. If you look around, it’s clear that God has decided that the power of government belongs in the hands of a wealthy elite who can gather wherever they like and make all the necessary decisions for the rest of us. Is this not the natural order of things? What is this rapacious appetite for democracy? Surely it must be a social disease. 

In a properly ordered society, wealth (like water) naturally flows uphill and is stored in a reservoir controlled by qualified Water Managers (see Johnstown Floods for best practice). They decide exactly how much water should be allocated to which people for which purpose. They decide where the pipes will run, how big they will be, where the valves will be placed, and how much flow actually needs to be released (pumped down). Our only concern is that everyone gets what is coming to them (and if you don’t mind, they will decide that). By the way, if you want a spigot connected to pipe that delivers your water, you will have to pay for the plumbing.  The good news is there will be no taxes, just prices (that’s the natural way). Taxes are artificial, not natural. Prices are a natural function of the marketplace.) 

As Mitten might say, "Look, its simple: if we can move all the water uphill we can cut the cost of distributing it by several orders of magnitude. Get rid of the unnecessary pumps and valves. They cost money to operate and maintain. We work with God. We use gravity. It's called "trickle down." Come on people ...we've gotten rid of the people, now if we can just get rid of the machines, it's all gravy. In God we trust!"

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